horror – comedy

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Summary: There are three certainties in modern life: death, taxes, and infuriating customer support. Even when you’re dead, you can’t catch a break. Ainlay Harrison is surprised to wake up as a ghost – and even more surprised to be onboarded into the AfterLife™’s most exciting project: hauntings. After a simple typo leaves Ainlay stranded at the wrong address, the only option is to correct the mistake – but that means going through the most feared and hated monster on either side of the grave: a customer service chatbot. Some things never change … and fighting through undead bureaucracy is enough to make anyone want to die. Will this blasted chatbot be enough to drive Ainlay to end it all? Or is there some way to drill some sense into this infernal bot? This tongue-in-cheek satirical novelette pokes fun at the gruelling realities of customer support and bureaucracy. Ainlay vs Infernal Support is a fun and witty read that’s perfect for fans of the TV series Ghosts and If Found, Return to Hell by Em X. Liu.

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Summary: RISE (noun / verb) Eight definitions to inspire writers around the world, and an unlimited number of possible stories to tell: 1) An upward slope or movement 2) A beginning or origin 3) An increase in amount or number 4) An angry reaction 5) To take up arms 6) To return from death 7) To become heartened or elated 8) To exert oneself to meet a challenge Rise features 300-word speculative flash fiction stories from across the rainbow spectrum, from the minds of the writers of Queer Sci Fi.

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Summary: “Aye, well, what is an angel, anyway?” At Samhain, things in Llwyncudd are taking a turn for the strange and bizarre. The red dragon is spotted around town trying to dig its own grave whilst his vessel is happily participating in life elsewhere. Did Stewart’s dragon spirit leave him? Michael, can’t live with the thought. Meanwhile, Dr Lilibeth Blackthorne, PsyD, has moved to town at her brother Sam’s suggestion. Many of its residents are in desperate need of her counselling services and she’s uniquely qualified—even if she’s never particularly seen multiple personalities quite like this. Fairy-halfling Arthen also joins the town after being raised in the local fairy village on the other side. Despite the odd cultural clashes of living in a society that requires silly things like clothing, he is making many new friends and is more special than his former masters would have him believe. Join our friends as they battle their demons from the darker side of the veil in Green Hills and Battlefields—the thrilling fifth book of the Green Hills Series by Celyn Kendrick!

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Summary: A hook-up gone bad can be purrder. Fresh from a breakup, deeply closeted freshman Zach jumps at the chance to housesit his family home and enjoy a long, horny summer free of both his ex and his religious parents. But when an old enemy turned hot hook-up falls to his death, Zach turns to the only true friend he's ever known-his cat, Grace Jones. With the dead man's phone and a knack for texting, she promises Zach help, for a price that will satisfy both their appetites. Does it matter if Grace Jones' powers draw on something far more ancient and sinister than a cell phone? "Get laid, Zachary. Get laid." Each new hook-up brings Zach darkly humorous discoveries about life, love, sex, and his own desires. But Zach knows it's only a matter of time before someone discovers his secret. Can he rely on his feline protector, or is he trapped in a hungry devil's bargain?

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Summary: Clarity (noun) Four definitions to inspire writers around the world and an unlimited number of possible stories to tell: 1) Coherent and intelligible 2) Transparent or pure 3) Attaining certainty about something 4) Easy to see or hear Clarity features 300-word speculative flash fiction stories from across the rainbow spectrum, from the minds of the writers of Queer Sci Fi.

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Summary: There’s something in the dark … but is Lem’s imagination worse than reality? Out in the vast emptiness of the galaxy, anything can happen. It’s a fact that Lem and her trusty companion Spock know all too well. Sometimes, the things lurking in the darkness are all in your head. Then again, maybe there really is something out there. With her talking dog and an infuriatingly literal AI by her side, Lem must rely on nothing but her strength and wits to help her. As a humorous homage to Arthur C Clarke’s classic A Walk in the Dark, this short adventure is a not-actually-scary sci-fi horror story that’s perfect for fans of Martha Wells and John Scalzi.

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Summary: Living in a quiet house on the outskirts of town, Ginger isn’t like the other girls. When she wakes up and discovers the unthinkable about her adoptive parents, she runs away and goes on a rampage straight to the only friend she has. Can she control what they both become? With a violent, growing hunger and more questions than answers, Ginger has nowhere to turn.

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Summary: INK (NOUN) Five definitions to inspire writers around the world and an unlimited number of possible stories to tell: 1) A colored fluid used for writing 2) The action of signing a deal 3) A black liquid ejected by squid 4) Publicity in the written media 5) A slang word for tattoos Ink features 300-word speculative flash fiction stories from across the rainbow spectrum, from the minds of the writers of Queer Sci Fi.

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Summary: Who expects a haunted doll to be such a nuisance? When Dare’s dog discovers an abandoned doll on their doorstep, Dare assumes it’s nothing more than a lost toy… until it begins to talk. After the doll offers up a string of bad suggestions and unhelpful advice, Dare is left wondering if the isolation of lockdown has finally proved too much. Struggling to get rid of the bad-tempered toy, Dare has no idea that this not-quite-scary fiend will accidentally change everything. With a dash of humour, this queer cosy-horror short story is a fun, quirky tale – perfect for readers who like the idea of being scared more than the reality of it.

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Summary: Three months after his run-in with the vampire Marcus Gråsson, Christopher’s ankle has healed but his life is anything but perfect. There are people watching the house. Flora’s worried about the scarecrow. And after an unexpected tragedy strikes, Christopher will need to figure out how to deal with the loss without tearing a rift between his brother and himself. When Victor accepts a job with Pretty, a prestigious private hospital, to work alongside the handsome Austen Poole, Christopher ends up with one more thing to worry about. While it might seem like a dream job, there’s something not quite right in paradise, and when Vic starts acting strangely, Christopher will stop at nothing to get his man back. When striving for perfection, you sometimes need to get your hands a little dirty.

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Summary: Rose Titus, author of The Vampire Next Door Trilogy, now brings together a collection of her best short stories. Here in this book you will find tales of vampires, werewolves, witches, ghosts, space aliens, and even a few angels. These stories answer questions such as where do we go after we die? What is the future of this planet? And what is the future of humanity? There are also stories of young runaways, old hippies, worried mothers, troubled families, love gone horribly wrong, selfish billionaires, people who find themselves suddenly homeless, old men with their recollections of days gone by, and girls gone wild! There may even be a murder or two.

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Summary: “Stephen Colbert meets Stephen King” - Book Nerd’s Brain Candy Winner of the 2012 Laine Cunningham Award! Withrow Surrett is more than just his neighborhood’s resident curmudgeon: he's also the self-declared vampire lord of North Carolina. Across the state, Jennifer McCordy is a genius stuck in a dead-end job. When the dead rise, which will Withrow’s neighbors find worse: the monsters outside or the vampire who might be their only hope? When Jennifer takes matters in hand, will the people around her trust her competence or surrender to their own prejudices? And when they meet, will anything survive? Perishables is a novel in three parts, telling the story of reclusive vampires, reluctant heroes, questionable potlucks, late-night electronics sales, retail hell, unexpected friendships, and post-apocalyptic recipes. It’s sometimes funny, sometimes deadly serious, and utterly original! Fans of The Black Knight Chronicles, The Tome of Bill, and Fred, the Vampire Accountant will love this series.

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Summary: Tyler Vaughan is a wildlife biologist who spends his days ear-tagging elk and monitoring bear populations in the Oregon Cascades. . . until the day one of his remote cameras captures an image of a strange, thin, eyeless humanoid—right around the time that children start disappearing from the nearby town of Crooked Creek. Tyler, his would-be girlfriend Rainey Carrington, and the skeptical, blustering Chief of Police Dale Blodgett, are reluctantly drawn into investigating a terrifying possibility—that their town is being visited by the specter of Slender Man, an evil entity long associated with kidnapping of children. The stakes only get higher when their inquiries turn them into targets. Will they be able to stop whoever is abducting the children of Crooked Creek, or will they be the next ones to disappear?

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Summary: Collected here are 35 short vampire tales by David Lee Summers and Lee Clark Zumpe. You'll find humor, horror, and history, loss, love, and legends, sex, seduction, and surprises. Many are good tales for couples to share. You'll find vignettes such as "Jornada del Muerto,""On the Ramjet," "Nosferatu Watches Dracula on the Lateshow," "Until Tonight,""The Poet," and "Ostrava, 1995." These particular pieces first ran in the magazine Blood Samples between 2001 and 2003. You'll also find longer works here including "Dragon Reborn" which is an excerpt from Dragon's Fall: Rise of the Scarlet Order Vampires that tells the origin of Lord Draco from Vampires of the Scarlet Order and Lee Clark Zumpe's story "Becalmed". The collection features a cover by Laura Givens and interior illustrations by Marge Simon. Blood Sampler is a must-read, even if you don't care for the usual suckers.